Attrition
by Dorian Gray
Summary: In the succession of days, Hisoka feels something slip away.


Standard Disclaimer: Yami no Matsuei © Matsuhita Youko, Central Park Media, et al.

Rating: G 

Summary: In the succession of days, Hisoka feels something slip away. 

AN: I'm trying something a little different here. If the font size of your browser is set unusually large, the formatting might be off. Feedback is welcomed and appreciated. Enjoy.

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Attrition

        

By Dorian Gray (hinikunokotsuzui@yahoo.com)

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Shinigami live forever.

                

So Hisoka should have guessed that it would happen.

                                                    

Sooner.

                                            

Or later.

His alarm went off.

                                        

. . . _I hate this thing_ . . .

                    

_. . . want to sleep . . ._

                         ****

Morning came through the window in pale beams.

_. . . stupid job . . ._

****

He washed, dressed, ate.

                                        

_. . . bread's stale . . ._

                    

_ . . . need to go shopping . . ._

    

_. . . ah tea . . ._

                                            

**Walked to work.**

Passed a few people.

                    

Felt eyes on him, following his movements.

                        

_. . . lust . . ._

    

. . . too young but cute . . .

                                

. . . gorgeous green eyes . . . 

                

. . . wish I had time to flirt with . . .

    

**He opened the door and went inside the imposing building.**

         __

. . . worry . . . 

                                            

**Walked down the hall.**

                 __

. . . four bodies found . . .

****

There was a new case.

                    

No two cases are the same, but after a while they all run together.

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Unlike Tsuzuki, he made no effort to remember the names and faces of all the people he killed. 

                                 __

. . . how many years has it been . . .

             ****

Tsuzuki himself was late again.

__

. . . irritation . . .                                         __

. . . that idiot . . .****

Two hours passed before he finally showed up.

                                         __

. . . depression . . .

. . ._ they are going to be so mad at me . . ._

                                

. . . anxiety . . .

****                     

Tatsumi yelled at him.

             __

. . . I deserve this . . .

There was a brief meeting.

                    

Who had died, when and where.

    

The blood-flecked details.

                    

**Tsuzuki looked at the crime-scene photos.**_ . . . grief . . ._

                        __

. . . horror . . . . . . anger . . . . . . guilt . . .

                                             ****

Hisoka did as well.

         __

. . . should I feel something . . .

**** __                         ****

They were to gather information at a local high school.

                                                            

**Again.**

__

. . . why do I always play the student . . .

                                                    

. . . always play a nurse . . .

****

If asked a month later, Hisoka wouldn't be able to recall any details of the case.

                                

_. . . lie, kill, repeat . . ._

     ****

He might remember the festival Tsuzuki dragged him to.

__                                 ****

There always seemed to be a festival.

****

And, of course, there were always crowds. 

                            _. . . joy . . . . . . . . . . laughter . . ._

    . . . haven't been here in years . . .

                    . . . jealousy . . . . . . anticipation . . .

                                                

. . . will he let me kiss him . . .

            . . . delight . . . . . . frustration . . .

                                    . . . what does he feel . . . . . . I want . . .

        

. . . glad to be here . . . 

                                            

. . . with you . . .

                        **Tsuzuki had smiled and laughed.**

__

. . . to see him smile . . .

                    

. . . to share this with him . . .

                                        

. . . affection . . .

****

Hisoka got a headache.

                            

_. . . I hate crowds . . ._

                ****

Later, Tsuzuki would ask him if he'd had a good time.

        

Hisoka would only shrug.

                    __

. . . were any of those feelings mine . . . 

                ****

He couldn't say.

So Hisoka went home again.

                            ****

Took some painkillers.

                                __

. . . repeat dosage until the pain is all gone . . .

****

Got an ice pack.

    __

. . . repeat until numb . . .

                                    

He set his alarm clock.

                                         __

. . . why am I waking up tomorrow . . .

         ****

And went to bed.

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Repeat.

                    

Until the days all run together.

                             __

. . . days to years . . .

                                

. . . years to decades . . .

                                        

. . . decades to . . .

****                     

Remember, shinigami live forever.


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